habitat day 2

if it's 40 degrees and sleeting/hailing, i must be doing habitat. 

and working outside.

ok, honestly, that part was really miserable.  i hate the cold.  i mean **HATE** it!  i'd rather have 90 degrees AND humidity (which i'll undoubtedly also get in the course of the summer).  i'll admit, i thought very seriously about not coming back after lunch, or about leaving early in the afternoon.  but i didn't.  i saw it through.

we worked outside most of the day.  there was a brief period before lunch when we were inside, but it was hardly enough time to warm up, and not enough to dry out.  i couldn't believe it when they said first thing in the morning that we'd be outside, and when it started to hail i really thought it must all be a joke.  after the hail turned to freezing rain and soaked us through -- and all i had done so far was pound in 4 nails and hold the ladder for people -- i was getting a little crabby.  (or maybe a lot.)

once inside, i finally got to do something.  i was the spackler.  there weren't many holes and dents to fill, but i got to do something i hadn't done before, so that made me very happy.

after lunch, though it was still cold and damp, i got to help erect heavy-duty scaffolding and install soffits and fascia on the front of the house.  that was cool.  there were three of us doing it, which was one too many to really get in there and do much work, but i was happy learning something new.  and it's always satisfying to watch progress being made.  it looked quite good when we were done.

the house leader, steve, was kind of a goofball.  his main way of interacting with people was teasing and being a bit over-the-top.  but he was a nice guy and felt that the volunteers learning something new was as important as the work getting done.  during the afternoon, he said something about us losing "the girls" that had been a part of our little team, saying they were inside cleaning up.  he asked if i'd rather go inside and work with them, to which of course i answered a hearty "no!" and "i'd rather stay out here and do real work."  he appreciated that, and said so.  at the end when i thanked him and was saying goodbye, i said i'd come back and he said, "please do."

the next day, a film crew and the buying family were scheduled to be there with another bunch of volunteers.  this is the 100th house built by habitat of huron valley, so it's getting a lot of press.  they were going to be doing siding on the front of the house for good filming, and our work was the necessary precursor for that to be able to happen.

oh, and they had sunny, 70-degree weather for it.

the cost of healthcare

boy, the pc isn't kidding when they say that the cost of the medical tests for application are not insignificant!

though i don't have the official forms to fill out yet, i know what they look like.  so when i had to have a physical for my health plan, i also had them order most of the other tests i needed.  they were mostly blood and urine tests, so no big deal.  unless i end up having to pay for them...

out of about 15 sets of required tests and immunizations, 8 are taken care of with blood/urine/cytology samples.  those 8 alone cost $1,431!!  NOT counting the office visit or blood lab draw.  just for the analysis.  holy crap!  if the insurance company somehow catches on that these were not all required as part of a normal physical, i could be hurtin'. 

and frankly, who would believe that checking for titers (evidence of past inoculations) for hepatitis, polio, rubella and mumps is part of a normal physical? 

none of this counts the mammogram, which was some ridiculous amount of money in itself (though clearly part of a physical and thus completely covered), hearing, vision, TB, or several boosters.  and if i was 50, there would have also needed to be an EKG.  oh, plus there's extensive dental paperwork, x-rays and detailed examinations for which i don't have nearly as good coverage.  nor does it count the followup testing and paperwork that i know will be required for a few items.

i hope i don't have to pay.  there are an awful lot of expenses that come with my decision to quit ford and join the pc, and i am aware of and planning for them.  joining the pc, in fact, could turn out to be the most expensive thing i've ever done in my life, truthfully.  but $1,400 for blood tests was not one of them.

makes me wonder what expenses are out there that i'm not anticipating.

habitat day 1

41 degrees, gray, and snowflakes in the air.  i was cold and now am very sore.

but it was a great day!

my first day of habitat for humanity was today.  i got there early and met the house leader, paul.  what a nice guy!  initially he said we'd be cleaning out the garage, but he also saw the look on my face when he said that.  his key guys seemed to be there, as well as a couple other volunteers.  in the end there was only one other woman there.

for the first task i was paired up with vince.  i'm not sure what was up with vince, but it became clear almost immediately that he was pretty clueless and not big on experience or common sense.  we unpacked a bathroom vanity and screwed it to the wall.  i managed to keep him from making more than two mistakes.

i don't know what paul saw/sensed, but everything went smoothly after that.  he paired me up with another guy and sent vince and the other woman off to paint and then clean the garage.  ray and i got to cut and install trim for the rest of the day.  paul completely trusted us to use the power tools without being watched over.  he just let us go.  the trim was not just simple boards -- it had a curved design to it, so cutting and fitting it required some special steps and extra care.  fun!  we finished all the closets and a couple of rooms.

at lunch i thanked paul for letting me do the "real work," and he said you could tell the people who really want to do stuff.

training wheels?

i got asked at work the other day whether i would consider going on a foreign assignment.  don't get too excited:  they were told to poll everybody.  anyway, it's got me thinking…

first of all, the categories were whether you'd consider a given region and whether you would only do it as a promotion.  i asked whether you could answer, "i'll do it only if it ISN'T a promotion."  that didn't seem to be an option.  the regions were europe, south america, australia, china, turkey, thailand, and india, in no particular order.  i said yes to europe, south america and australia.  easy choice.

as i was retelling a friend that night, she looked at me a little bit like i had lost my head (which we've already established is more than possible given the way i've been losing and forgetting things these days).  she said "let me get this right.  you're willing to go just about anywhere and live in a mud hut for the peace corps, but you're not willing to go to turkey or thailand with a company taking care of you along the way?"  all i could answer was a sheepish "well, yeah."

so the next day i added turkey, thailand and india to the list.  truly, i have no desire to live in china, whether for work or the peace corps.

since then, i can't help but to keep thinking about it.  there is practically no way that the company will want to send me on foreign service – for a variety of reasons.  but it is an interesting little fantasy.  would it not still be an adventure?  would it not still be challenging and exciting?  would i not still learn a new language and culture?  i know it would not be as easy as my stint in germany.  (not that moving to a place where you don't know anybody and can't speak the language and don't know the culture is ever really easy.)  i would likely not be part of a group of people going over together.  at least half those regions would be a seriously new culture to even begin considering.  and the work would probably be much more difficult, with much less support.  but… it would be a foreign adventure with a continuing income.  it would be a move (and packing and storage) assisted by the company.  it would be selling my house with financial assistance.  and it would only be for 3 years or so, with the safety net of a job to come back to, for however long (or short) i might want it.

that's not to say i'd want to give up going into the peace corps.  i'm thinking "and," not "or."  i would absolutely still want to go into the peace corps.  but a foreign service assignment would be a great adventure with less risk, and would take me that much closer to retirement and put off the insecurity of being jobless and clueless as to what to do next. 

sort of a little bit like training wheels for the peace corps.

grammatical whimsy

is it possible that spanish has changed since i learned it?

i've been studying some basic grammar in order to prep for eventually taking this certification test, and i am discovering some surprising things.  there are constructions of which i have no memory from when i was learning spanish the first time.  there are common phrases that are completely new to me.  there are grammar rules that i swear no one ever taught me.

now i had two years of spanish in middle school, a full four in high school, and a semester at college at the level of collegiate spanish 3.  these basic beginning spanish grammar things should not be surprising me.  was my spanish education really that bad?  is my memory really that awful?  or has spanish changed?

ok, it's true that the spanish at north branford high school was somewhere between horrid and non-existent at the higher levels.  which, now that i think about it, explains why i recall having a tough time keeping up in college.  i always attributed that to the fact that we never actually *spoke* spanish in our classes in high school.  and the fact that EVERYTHING was a struggle for me at MIT.  but remembering how we took turns getting mrs pawchuk off-topic -- and how well it worked -- and how we even got her talking about pasties one time (no, not the michigan pastry type)...  i guess i shouldn't be surprised.

and there's no doubt that my memory really has become that bad.  hard to argue that, especially given-- wait, what was i saying?  never mind, point taken.

but still, so many things that are basic and yet completely unfamiliar to me?  surely spanish has changed along the way, right?

phew!

ok, the emergency is over.

it turns out there was another requirement for this crazy last-minute assignment:  construction experience.  and, as much as i wield a mean screwdriver, i had nothing to put down on the page.  i mean, we're talking a form meant for skilled trades journeymen (sic).  i'm pretty sure that "yeah, i hung drywall once, for four hours" wasn't going to cut it.

so what i will now refer to as "that insane idea" is over.  that's not to say things go back to normal, though.  i am going to continue working on my spanish and a few other things.  (anticipatory music in the background…)

you see, i really do want to go to latin america.  and i really feel that i have more to offer than just teaching math or science.  not that it is "just" that, but lots of people can teach math or science.  i want to do something that helps people more directly.  something that brings them clean water or provides the infrastructure for those students.  something that creates a physical product and that will allow me to solve problems.  but as it stands now, i am going to be slated to teach math or science in africa (or somewhere).

the first problem:  the pc will only station people in latin america if they are already fairly fluent in spanish.  the thinking is that there are so many candidates that have had spanish classes that they don't need to take non-spanish-speakers and start from square zero with training them in the language.  my spanish, however, is from too long ago.  it has a shelf life, don't cha know.  there is this sneaky little language requirement that the regular pc stuff does not tell you.  you have to have had at least two years worth of college spanish in the last 6 or 8 years in order to qualify for those countries.  (or something like that – i can't seem to get a clear answer.)  luckily for me, there is one loophole.  the CLEP test.  it's a test through which you can get college credit for past experience/knowledge on a variety of subjects.  if i can get a 60 (out of 80) on the spanish CLEP, i can be considered for the countries i really want.  stretch and hopeful goal #1.

then there's the teaching vs. construction thing.  the second problem.  they won't give me anything in engineering.  (thought of the day:  working at ford for 21 years qualifies me to do exactly nothing.)  so the closest i can get to the kind of stuff i'd like to do is general construction.  shocking as it may be, they want people for these positions who've done a thing or two in the construction field.  (never mind all the descriptions of the construction stuff they sent me that talk about organizing and managing and getting community involvement and getting utilization of the end product and other stuff.)  enter loophole number two, i hope.  the recruiter tells me that if i have a solid three months volunteering with habitat for humanity, that will count as some construction experience.  so that is my plan.  which, incidentally, is an excellent thing to do in and of itself.  anyhow, i'm going to learn as much as habitat can teach me about as many different things as i am lucky to encounter.  stretch and hopeful goal #2.

and if nothing else, i now have some more time to get my life a bit organized.  the nomination will come in early may and the projected leaving date will be early 2012 (jan-feb-mar).  i've got a lot of work to do between now and then.  but at least i won't be an absolute stress monster trying to be ready to leave in 4 months.  god, that really was insane.

craziness ensues

apologies for not updating lately.  i just haven't been feeling very literary.

that's not to say that things haven't been happening.  in no particular order, i went to a formal information session, had my first physical, had my second interview, and experienced extreme disappointment and exhilaration almost at the same time.

the information session was interesting.  sounds like i better get prepared to live in a mud hut with a hole in the ground for a bathroom.  while not much of the presented information was new to me, there were five returned peace corps volunteers who answered questions as a panel.  they reiterated some common things i already knew – be prepared for terrible loneliness at some points, expect to get violently ill along the way – as well as some things i already suspected – there won't be hot showers (or showers at all), the hardest part is adjusting to life back here when you return, etc.  one thing that they solidified in my mind was the need to be completely open and transparent about medical issues ahead of time.  but most interesting, of course, was hearing about their individual circumstances and experiences.  from asking them and other investigations i've done, it seems that having electricity is slightly more likely than having running water, and having hot water is just not going to happen.  that "two words" entry i posted a while back should have said "hot shower" rather than "diet coke"!

i say that i had my "first" physical because i don't yet have the official paperwork to begin the medical screening process.  i needed a physical for my health plan, and was lucky enough to find a copy of the forms online, so i was able to get my doctor to look over the forms and order ahead of time all the tests that need to be done.  this will be a good start for when i finally do get the paperwork officially.  i still need a "second" physical where the doctor will officially fill out the paperwork, do the eye and hearing exams, etc.  i've got something scheduled for the end of the month, but that, too, may be complicated…

which brings me to my second interview.  it finally happened this past tuesday.  and, although the guy said he would put me through to the next step in the process (officially nominating me), it did not go well.  i was a little frazzled for unrelated reasons at the beginning and did not answer questions as smoothly and confidently (and correctly!) as i should have.  but more than that, he informed me that the pc would not even consider sending me to anywhere in latin america because my spanish was too long ago.  then came the next blow, that i would not be getting an engineering assignment because i'm not a civil or environmental engineer.  and finally, that he would nominate me but since the 2011 assignments are pretty much filled up, i'd have to wait until may when he had 2012 assignments available to choose.  (which means no starting the medical process either.)

so i can pretty much start envisioning myself as a math teacher in africa if i want to really go into the peace corps.  i don't want to be negative or picky, but that's not at all what i had in mind.  and i am crushed to not even be able to be considered for latin america.  a lot to adjust to, and a lot of disappointment for one day. 

a couple hours later, as i was still in mid-sulk, he called me back.  with an opportunity.  but as with so many opportunities, it was not without its catches.  he said he had an assignment in latin america for general construction (which is as close as i'm going to be able to get to engineering).  but i have to be able to pass an advanced spanish test with a certain score by early june AND the assignment starts in august.  *THIS* august!

this may not sound so bad to you, dear reader, but trust me it is overwhelming.  and not as easy a decision as it may seem.  if i don't pass the exam, my application gets withdrawn and there will be a delay in my being considered for the 2012 assignments.  furthermore, the exam can only be taken again after six months have passed.  if i don't pass it outright in early june – which is ridiculously soon! – then i won't have the chance to take it again until december, a bit late to be considered for any early 2012 assignments.  and that exam is my only chance at latin america.  so i have to be fluent to the level of two full years of college spanish in two months.  considering that the latest spanish i've had was 24 years ago (and was only equivalent to about 1.5 college years), this is a serious roadblock.  followed closely by the next serious roadblock – being ready in any way to leave by august:  emotionally, practically, financially, physically, and any other way.  not even close.  and then there's the question of whether they'll pass me medically in that quick a timeframe.  it is safe to say, this opportunity is both terrifying and overwhelming.

but is it a sign?  the kind of assignment i want in an area i want, which otherwise very possibly might not happen.  perhaps this is fate taking things out of my hands and telling me to just shut my eyes tight and jump.  what do i really lose if i go for it?  it truly is bordering on the impossible, but if i try and make it, maybe it was meant to be.  and if i try and fail, mostly all i've lost is a little time in the overall process.  but this is way too fast!

on the other hand, i haven't heard back from him in the timeframe he said i would, so maybe they found a better candidate for the assignment.  or maybe the home office in d.c. didn't like the compromise he was willing to make with me (nominating me for an assignment without one of the core requirements being met).

i guess the recruiter wasn't kidding when he said, "things could change."  and i suspect they are not done changing.