hope

hope is a funny thing.  generally it's positive, a force that can inspire and lead to beauty and change.  on the other hand, hope sometimes comes with a companion, disappointment.

i got a call from the pc friday.  my nomination is on its way in the mail.  math in sub-saharan africa.  it's exactly what i expected, yet somehow i'm still disappointed now that it's official.  i had really begun to hope that, with my clear preferences and my stated commitment to preparing myself in spanish and construction, maybe the nomination would somehow have taken that into account.  i know, i know.  but my optimism and hopefulness had taken over.

it's not set in stone.  the nomination is just a preliminary, general suggestion from the recruiter to the pc for a placement.  in a few months i'll have the chance to submit an updated resume which, if i can get done what i need to, may qualify me to be considered for other assignments.  and in any event, the final assignment can and often does differ from the nomination.  let's hope.

life seldom goes exactly as planned, and even less often as hoped-for.  generally i believe that things work out as they're meant to, and i know i need to keep an open mind as to where i'll go and what i'll do.  still, i have some hopes about that.